Love your spouse as you loved no other….

“If I knew that today would be the last time I’d see you, I would hug you tight and pray the Lord be the keeper of your soul. If I knew that this would be the last time you pass through this door, I’d embrace you, kiss you, and call you back for one more. If I knew that this would be the last time I would hear your voice, I’d take hold of each word to be able to hear it over and over again. If I knew this is the last time I see you, I’d tell you I love you, and would not just assume foolishly you know it already.”
Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez

 

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Game of Thrones

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I don’t follow too many series except a notable few.

Game of Thrones is one of them.

My husband got me hooked (damn him)  :) (with their nod towards Medieval Europe), while we were at the lake a few weekends ago.  My daughter has also come into the fold and I find it far better than Once Upon A Time (one of her favorites)…though the nudity and sex scenes remind me of True Blood (minus the vamps of course), it’s still an overall good serial and I look forward to watching some of my favorite characters coming into their own including the Stark family.

 

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Getting older + Losing Weight = one frustrated lady

Going through “the change” is no picnic. There’s the hot-flashes, weight gain…oh yes the weight gain, mood swings, and overall “blahness” when you’re experiencing the middle-age rite of passage into the next stage of your life.

No matter how I’ve previously tried slewing off the pounds, it does NOT work. Not the way it used to at least.  Before I could cut down on my calories, go to the gym, and watch the weight just slide off.

Not this time.

This time it’s much more difficult.  I find myself wishing for some magic pill to simply give me the energy (which the change does robs) to get through the day, to not crave sugary sweets and carbs so much…to find the motivation to work out.

Having a partner whose 100% on board helps.

Having a gym partner helps.

But we don’t always get the latter and we must find the fortitude to push forward and do it ourselves and at this rate if I continue on this path I’ll weigh 200 pounds in no time.

Not good.

The Mayo Clinic has a good article for women like me who are going through this different lifestyle change (or for you curious men who want to find out why your wife all of a sudden is not your sweet love any longer):

What causes menopause weight gain?

The hormonal changes of menopause might make you more likely to gain weight around your abdomen than around your hips and thighs. Hormonal changes alone don’t necessarily trigger menopause weight gain, however. Instead, the weight gain is usually related to aging, as well as lifestyle and genetic factors.

For example, muscle mass typically diminishes with age, while fat increases. Loss of muscle mass decreases the rate at which your body uses calories, which can make it more challenging to maintain a healthy weight. If you continue to eat as you always have and don’t increase your physical activity, you’re likely to gain weight.

Genetic factors also might play a role in menopause weight gain. If your parents or other close relatives carry extra weight around the abdomen, you’re likely to do the same.

Sometimes factors such as the stress of children leaving — or returning — home, divorce, the death of a spouse, or other life changes might change your diet or exercise habits and contribute to menopause weight gain.

 

(source)

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In summary, it’s simple as the article states, move more, eat less and find support. Simple.

Sometimes but it takes the right frame of mind to change.

“See if you can catch yourself complaining, in either speech or thought, about a situation you find yourself in, what other people do or say, your surroundings, your life situation, even the weather. To complain is always nonacceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconscious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power. So change the situation by taking action or by speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness.”
Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment

 

Indeed, if you applied this philosophy to your every day relationships imagine how much better you’ll feel including having meaningful conversations instead of nagging/knit-picking your spouse or significant other.  There’s enough stresses out there which will trigger our negativity. Don’t bring it home if you can help it.  Of course we’re only human but if we can catch ourselves before we spiral down that hole perhaps, just perhaps, your life situation will improve and trust me, it can create a wonderful domino effect within other areas of your life:

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Dressing for success

The old adage is quite true.  When we conform to the professional world both physically and mentally we are bound to succeed.  However, with that being said…….when you work in an environment where the dress code is quite laxed, and the only people wearing suits is management, the mental mindset is undoubtedly what determines whether you will continue up the promotion ladder or not.

I am quite lucky in that I’ve been promoted 4 times in the past 12 years.  In the federal government you are promoted on merit and you take exams which will determine your current skill set, and, if you’re able to take on the additional responsibilities of the next higher grade.  What you wear is not as necessarily important as what you know.

I have seen various forms of dress from sweat pants to suits.  For myself, it depends on my current mood as to what I’ll pick out from my vast array of “vestments” from my colorful closet.  Today was a “blah” kind of day.



My husband sweetly pointed out I was dressed as all the others. I knew I was and yes, it was also a wake up call to perhaps step out of my comfort zone of jeans and t-shirt and break out my summer dresses and tasteful blouses.

I also realize if you dress for success it actually does affect your psyche. I do feel prettier and far more professional.

Just today wasn’t the day.

 

Perhaps tomorrow I’ll release this funk and create a fresh start.  Certainly my mood warrants it.

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